In the interest of full disclosure, I don’t read Playboy for the pictures, either. If I want to see well-lit T&A, I’m lucky enough to be able to step into my shower. You wouldn’t believe the money I don’t spend on internet porn.

I’m a big fan of Playboy for a reason that has nothing to do with literary merit or bouncy body parts. His name is Dan Dunn. He’s known as The Imbiber; he’s the spirits writer for Playboy and he just gave me a big ol’ box o’ booze to review.

Never stop believing in miracles, kids.

The only thing naked in this post will be my reviews. But don’t hold it against me. I promise I’m good and my wine rack is awesome (even in low light).

Campo Viejo Crianza Tempranillo 2006

From the world-renowned Rioja region of Spain comes an “old friend.” A blend of Tempranillo, Garnacha and Mazuelo, this deep, dark garnet wine has a golden rim in the glass and a nose of plum and cherry, ripe blackberry and vanilla. 12 months of barrel aging adds smooth vanilla on the palate and soft, ripe fruits like the cherry and blackberry you smell right out of the bottle. But this baby burns. It’s acidic; the initial velvet mouthfeel is replaced by a tinge of acid in the back of the throat. Nonetheless, I really enjoyed it the first night. It felt rich, smooth. It went down easy. I didn’t enjoy it as much the next night. It wasn’t bad but it wasn’t as good as the first time. And in my opinion, it should always be better the second time around.

Rating: 88

Castello Monaci Piluna Primitivo 2007

Italian Primitivo is the genetic twin of the grape we know as Zinfandel. Generally best consumed in the first 3 – 5 years after bottling, the longer Primitivo/Zinfandel ages in the bottle, the more that lush, jammy fruit taste diminishes.

Apparently for the Castello Monaci Piluna, now is a great time to drink the 2007. Dark purple in the glass, with a nose of cherry, blackberry and blueberry. On the palate it’s all ripe black fruit deliciousness. Balanced, velvety mouthfeel. Medium tannins, medium finish. There was a slight burning on the way down, but just the slightest bit. At around 11 bucks a bottle, this is a great buy.

Rating: 90

Trapiche Broquel Chardonnay 2007

In doing research for this piece, I noticed that the importer used the word “international” to describe this wine and its packaging no less than 1 billion times (give or take a few). So I’m going to wager that they’re describing this wine as “international” to reassure potential buyers that it’s as good as Bordeaux and California Chardonnay; maybe they’re afraid the average bear won’t buy a Chardonnay from Argentina. Could that be true? Do we use Argentina for their Malbec and rudely walk away from the rest?

If that’s the case, than shame on us. This wine is delightful. Lovely, golden straw in the glass. A nose of honey and apricot and peach. Flavors of green apple, honeysuckle, grass, muscat and apricot. It’s crisp but has backbone. A bit of bite, but – under the right circumstances – a bite isn’t bad. At $15 a bottle, it’s a little more than I’d want to spend, but if you find it on sale, go for it.

Rating: 89

Those are my favorites from the free stuff I got; I raise a glass and toast. Here’s to women and wine. Here’s to Dan Dunn, The Imbiber. And here’s to the magazine that circuitously brought all of them together in this piece. Cheers!