Spirits Reviews

The Imbiber's Vodka Throwdown

Written by Craig Outhier     August 18, 2009     Hits: 892     Favorites 0
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The Imbiber's Vodka Throwdown

You know what I love about vodka, besides how smart and dashing it makes me? I love that you can manufacture the stuff out of practically anything: grain, grapes, potatoes, sugar beet molasses, ketchup . . . why, an enterprising distiller could mop the octagon after next week’s Randy Couture fight in Oregon and turn that into a passable vodka spirit, once he filters out the bits of flesh and teeth and such.


Not everyone in the vodka world is so open-minded. In fact, the so-called “Vodka Belt” countries (Russia, Poland, Ukraine, etc.) reserve the “vodka” designation exclusively for spirits distilled from grain, potato and sugar beet. Grape-based vodkas have to be called something else. “Decadent Westerner Pussy Juice” is commonly used. In deference to the Putinist vodka purists, we at The Imbiber have limited the following double-blind taste test to grain-based vodkas. Happy, comrades?

THE TASTE TEST
Our taste test was conducted using five well-known commercial vodkas, with a panel of three testers: Tester A (female, mid 30s, sensitive palate), Tester B (male, late 30s, medium palate) and Tester C (male, early 30s, semi-alcoholic). All vodkas were chilled and consumed straight.

Grey Goose
Arguably America’s leading premium brand, this high-priced tipple was the concoction of septuagenarian billionaire Sidney Frank, the booze visionary who first imported Jagermeister to the States. Frank suspected that Americans would pay above-slot for a vodka bottle emblazoned with the French tricolor and fitted with a classy cork top, so he set up a distillery in Cognac and started exporting it to the U.S. in 1997. It was an immediate commercial smash and has since become a favorite lyrical trope for hip-hop stars like L’il Jon (“The Goose/Got me loose”).

Our panel was surprised by the Goose’s comparatively pungent nose and rich body. Off-put at first, Tester A called it “kinda buttery and viscous.” Tester B lauded its “velvet” texture and stomach-soothing finish, which supports the old adage that first-rate vodka is felt, not tasted.

Suggested use: Dry martini

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Review: Scapa 16-year-old

Written by Dan Dunn     March 19, 2009     Hits: 1495     Favorites 0
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We're used to whisky being discussed in terms of aging, but for Scapa single malts that has come to mean something else. The distiller created a 10-year-old that some folks still horde with a zeal usually reserved for discontinued street drugs. Then they issued the whisky as a 12 year old and then a 14 year old. It was like watching the drink grow up.

Welcome to Scapa's Sweet 16 party.

Scapa certainly has the legacy thing nailed: Distillery dating back to the 1800s, check; legendary location, check (the Orkney Isles, you gotta be kidding me); small authentic volume, check. All that and aged in American oak.

The new 16-year-old version is significantly better than the "old" 14 year old, if memory serves (and it may not). But if your idea of "island" single malts includes strong peat tastes, this ain't that. Instead, you get a very oak-ish, rich flavor and some peaty moments in the finish. At about $65 to $75, this is shaping up as what amounts to a value brand among the high-end single malts.

It's worth noting that this is a very good "transition" single malt for bourbon drinkers or blend lovers. It perhaps lacks the assertive distinction of cult scotches (and we all have our own list) but is a very whisky-ish choice. It's a "watch the sunset" sipper, as opposed to a "get thee to a dark pub" sipper.

Another thing to like is that it's not all that common yet, giving your top shelf a bit of distinction. If you're into singles, this is worth a spin and will likely become somebody's favorite. Plus, we'd highly recommend it for those looking for an introductory single malt that sidesteps the more harsh realities of a peatfest.

Tuaca or not Tuaca?

Written by Dan Dunn     February 23, 2009     Hits: 859     Favorites 0
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Tuaca or not Tuaca?

By Dan Dunn

Yours Truly winters in sunny Southern California, where the temperature rarely dips below a half-a-buck in the dead of night in January. And it’s a good thing, too, because frozen breast implants would undoubtedly spell disaster
for the cast of “The Real Housewives of Orange County” – the Official Favorite Television Show of The Imbiber. But I watched last weekend’s NFL slate on TV while sunning out by the pool, so I know that it’s colder than a pimp’s heart in other parts of the country these days. I feel for you, my cold-weather friends, I really do, which is why I’m about to introduce you to a toasty treat that will help take some of the sting out of the bitterest arctic chill.

The Tuaca Hot Apple Pie is absolutely scrumptious and could hardly be easier to prepare. Simply combine 5-6 ounces of hot apple cider with a shot of Tuaca in a mug and garnish with whipped cream and a cinnamon stick. And just what IS Tuaca (pronounced “two-AH-ka”), you ask?

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Martin Miller's Gin is Tops

Written by Dan Dunn     February 23, 2009     Hits: 1261     Favorites 0
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Martin Miller's Gin is Tops

It isn’t often The Imbiber comes across a spirit so remarkable, I’m willing to anoint it the best of its kind – mainly for fear of pissing off the other guys and getting shut out of cool events. Alas, I must risk being blackballed by Bombay, Tanqueray and the other fine “ays” out there who produce gin because it appears I have discovered THE CHOSEN ONE. Martin Miller’s London Dry Gin is the eponymous creation of an English antiques expert who, having grown frustrated over a perceived dearth of quality gins, decided to whip up an ultra premium of his own. After much trial and error, Miller concocted an 80-proof wonder that has the potential to revolutionize and re-popularize gin in much the same way the likes of Grey Goose and Ketel One did for vodka.

Miller seeks out the best botanicals – juniper, and other stuff like cassia bark and Florentine Iris – and distills it in hundred-year-old copper still dubbed Grandma. Once the heart of the single batch distillation is extracted it gets shipped from the UK to Iceland, where it’s married with lava-filtered glacial water and bottled. I’m telling you, people, ole’ Marty should have called the stuff Baby’s Ass instead, cuz it’s THAT smooth (and drinking enough of it will get you pretty, uh, crappy). Is it the water? The still? Magic? I dunno, but I can tell you that Miller’s gin is so good it was just awarded double gold at the 2006 San Francisco World Spirits Competition.

Price is $27.99, which is roughly the cost of two Ricky Martin cds. And if you look at it that way – Ricky Martin versus Martin Miller – it’s kind of a no-brainer. What, you ask, is up with the random Ricky Martin reference? That’s easy – I’m high on gin and tonic, and livin’ la vida loca. Anybody wanna join me?

This Rum is a Little Nuts

Written by Dan Dunn     February 19, 2009     Hits: 749     Favorites 0
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You know that stellar part of the Beastie Boys’ song “Root Down” where Mike D screams “Oh my God that’s some funky shit!”? Well, your Imbiber happened to be listening to that very section of that track at the precise moment I took my first chilled sip of something called Castries Peanut Rum Crème. And what went through my mind just then? Straight up, Mike D. Castries is funky in a kickin’ it root down way — think Mr. Peanut surfing a wave of molasses on a sunny beach in the Caribbean. No, for real … let that image wash over you. You’ll feel better.

Castries takes its name from the picturesque capital city of St. Lucia, one of the Windward Islands in the eastern Caribbean Sea. That’s where they procure the aged rum that is carefully blended with vanilla from Madagascar, cream and peanuts. The taste reminds me of a mouthful of Snickers, peanut brittle, Bailey’s Irish Crème and banana, which is odd given I’ve never actually had all of those things in my mouth at the same time.

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